Is “Good Enough” Enough?

Years ago, foster care operated on a model of survival: move the child, meet the minimum, keep things moving. There wasn’t room for nuance, for deep healing, or for the messiness of trauma-informed love. But as the research grew louder—through the ACEs study, brain scans, attachment theory—we started to understand: children don’t need perfect homes. They need safe, consistent, good enough ones. Psychologist Donald Winnicott first coined the term "good enough mother" in the 1950s, explaining that children thrive when their caregivers are reliably attuned—not flawlessly, but faithfully. And in homes touched by foster care, where chaos and crisis often come first, this kind of faithful presence is gold.

I remember one family who called us in the middle of what they jokingly called “the lasagna breakdown.” It was a Tuesday night, and their new placement had lost it over the idea of a noodle touching a green bean. Plates were thrown, doors slammed, everyone cried. And yet, the parent cleaned up the mess, made a PB&J, and sat quietly next to their child until the storm passed. That’s what showing up looks like. Not because they had it all figured out—but because they stayed. Over time, that child began to trust food again, trust mealtimes again, trust people again. That moment didn’t look perfect. But it was good enough.

At Foster Light, we believe deeply in this kind of love—the kind that says, “I’m not going anywhere,” even when it’s hard. You don’t need a perfectly clean home or a flawless parenting record to make a difference. You need to show up, over and over again, with a steady presence and an open heart. That kind of goodness? It changes lives. It's the light we fight for. And in our experience, good enough is exactly what makes all the difference.